32 reasons a PowerPoint slide deck is nothing like a bra.
32個(gè)理由證明PPT不像女人的胸罩
1. I wear a bra every day, but could do without daily PowerPoint.
我每天都穿胸罩,但不是每天都做PPT。
2. Personally, I think most other women would benefit more from a bra than PowerPoint too.
我認(rèn)為大多數(shù)女人從胸罩獲益比PPT更多。
3. You can’t buy a PowerPoint slide deck off the shelf.
你不能買到現(xiàn)成的PPT。
4. There’s no such thing as a Push-up PowerPoint deck.
沒有墊出來的PPT。
5. There’s no such thing as a Miracle PowerPoint deck, not even from Nancy Duarte or Garr Reynolds.
PPT不可能像神奇胸罩那樣讓你顯得大起來,即使 Nancy Duarte 或者 Garr Reynolds(兩個(gè)著名的演講人)也沒這個(gè)本事。
6. You can’t improve a bra, but you can improve a slide deck.
你不能改善胸罩,但可以改善PPT。
7. You can’t give away your slide deck to someone who would fit it better.
你不能把你的PPT送給更適合的人。
8. Bras don’t have annoying transition effects like “window blinds“, “newsflash”, and “fade out”.
胸罩沒有“百葉窗”,“閃入”,“淡入”這樣復(fù)雜的轉(zhuǎn)場效果。
9. Bras don’t have annoying sound effects.
胸罩沒有煩人的聲效。
10. It’s never a surprise when someone pulls out a PowerPoint slide deck in a business meeting.
如果人們在商務(wù)會議上拿出一個(gè)PPT,這毫不奇怪。
11. People will fall asleep in front of a PowerPoint slide deck.
人們會在PPT面前昏昏入睡。
12. No one anticipates the Victoria’s Secret PowerPoint catalo.
沒人知道維多利亞的秘密公司PPT里面的內(nèi)容,恩,不過每個(gè)人都知道維多利亞的秘密里面的內(nèi)容。
13. A bra works perfectly even if there’s no projector, screen, or laptop in the room.
即使房間里面沒有投影儀、屏幕和筆記本電腦,胸罩也能照常使用。
14. Nobody ever asks for a copy of my bra after a meeting.
從來沒有人會在會議后找我要一份胸罩的拷貝。
15. A PowerPoint slide deck is completely useless when exercising, while a bra is only somewhat useless.
鍛煉的時(shí)候PPT完全沒有用,胸罩也許還有點(diǎn)。
16. You can’t craft a bra to suit your purpose.
你不能編制一個(gè)胸罩來迎合你的目的。
17. Bras might be persuasive or motivational, but are rarely educational.
胸罩可能是充滿誘惑與充滿激情,但很少是說教的。
18. The Rule of Thirds says a slide contains four “power points”; human anatomy says a bra contains two “power points”.
三點(diǎn)法則說一個(gè)PPT包含4個(gè)“重點(diǎn)”,人體解剖學(xué)說一個(gè)胸罩包含兩個(gè)“重點(diǎn)”。
19. Death by PowerPoint is an overused cliche.Death by Bra is not (yet).
不少人都宣稱PPT已死,不過胸罩的命似乎還很長。
20. 40 point bold text on a slide deck is acceptable.On bras? Not so much.
PPT有40碼加粗的,胸罩呢?有這么大的嗎。
21. Only one Nobel Peace Prize winner uses PowerPoint, but nine wear bras. (An inconvenient truth or fiction?)Nine women have won the Nobel Peace Prize
只有一個(gè)諾貝爾和平獎(jiǎng)得主使用PPT,但有9個(gè)穿胸罩。前副總統(tǒng)戈?duì)柺侵葜v人,依靠環(huán)保方面的演講獲得諾貝爾獎(jiǎng)。而有九位女性曾經(jīng)獲得諾貝爾獎(jiǎng)。
22. You can’t use the same slide deck all day long, day after day.
你不能日復(fù)一日一直使用同樣的PPT。
23. Slide decks don’t transition well from day to evening.
PPT不能很好地從白天轉(zhuǎn)場到晚上。
24. Teenagers know how to use bras, but adults still have trouble with PowerPoint.
小孩都知道如何使用胸罩,但有些成人還不會使用PPT。
25. Your mom will usually buy your first bra for you.
你媽媽通常會幫你買第一個(gè)胸罩。
26. With bras, only teen-aged girls pad them with useless fluff.
只有十幾歲的女孩才往胸罩里墊毛線。
27. It’s socially acceptable for men to use a slide deck, as long as it’s a good one.
社會可以接受一個(gè)男人使用PPT,只要他們制作水平還不錯(cuò)。
28. PowerPoint slides look best when projected on a flat surface.
PPT投在平面上效果最好,恩,胸罩嘛,這個(gè)我就不說了。
29. Guy Kawasaki has no 10-20-30 rule for bras.
Guy Kawasaki(另一個(gè)著名的PPT教育家)沒有關(guān)于胸罩的10-20-30原則。
30. Establishments that outlaw bras are labeled “trashy.” Companies that outlaw PowerPoint are labeled “forward-thinking.”
取締胸罩的條款被標(biāo)為“垃圾”,取締PPT的公司被稱為“有遠(yuǎn)見”
31. Your employer will likely issue you a standard slide deck in corporate colors.
你的老板可能要求你的PPT使用公司標(biāo)準(zhǔn)色。
32. A laser pointer rarely accompanies a bra.
激光筆很少會在胸罩上指指點(diǎn)點(diǎn)。
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